Today I am pleased to celebrate 28 years of marriage with my beloved husband Kevin. 28 years ago I didn't know much about sacrifice, about the meaning of godly submission, or thinking of putting others first. I just knew that I had found someone who finally loved me and accepted me, warts and all. Besides he was tall, dark and handsome, had a job and cared very much for my safety and protection. What more could a girl want?
So we walked down the aisle at our Baptist church amidst the beautiful aqua tea length dresses my lovely bridesmaids wore and handsome gray tuxes of the groomsmen. With roses and daisies in my hair, wearing my mother's ivory dress, I looked in my bridegroom's tender brown eyes and promised to honor and obey him (Ephesians 5:22-24) in good times and bad.We sang many hymns in the service and the good news of the Gospel was preached.What a happy beautiful day.
We have indeed had our share of good times and bad. Kids, a precious gift from the Lord, have tested the loyalty of our love for each other as we disagreed over discipline. Money worries have come and gone and recently, physical injuries and lack of employment for a long period.
But what if I was totally relying on my husband to carry me through those times? There were times when my children were very small that I relied on him to do things for me that only God could provide. Those times my dear husband tried so hard to carry all the burden but he could not. We all have feet of clay.
There were times when we considered we would become a statistic. We never did. And today, we look at each other with hope in each other's eyes. We know each other's quirks inside and out. We have braved deep waters together. We have survived the storm of parenting. Finally, the glue that really held us together were three things:
1. Our common faith in Jesus Christ. (What brought us together in the first
place, and is so important for believers to be equally yoked as discussed
in II Corinthians 6: 14-15.
2. Commitment to be loyal to one another in all aspects of the marriage
3. The dumb jokes we share. This started in our courtship. We had this thing
about making all these corny jokes. We still do. Laughter has diffused so
many tense situations.
Maybe some of these ideas may help someone somewhere struggling in their marriage. I once heard some very good adice. Don't go looking for "the perfect one." YOU be the one to effect the change in your marriage. The day my happiness in marriage started was the day I realized that my husband could not ultimately fulfill my deepest needs. Only one Person could do that, and He is the Person of Jesus Christ.
When I am rightly attuned in my relationship with Jesus, I can love my husband without expecting him to give me something that will fulfill me, because my needs have already been filled to the max through Jesus!